The 10 Realities Of Dating A Bodybuilder

So you’re dating a bodybuilder. Good for you. They are admirable men, with the drive and focus that you can only expect from professional athletes. And they ARE professionals. Even if the man you have your eye on has never been near a stage, and hasn’t even purchased his Speedo’s yet, you can bet he takes his passion for lifting very seriously. As such, there are a few things you should know about that rippling hunk so as to avoid any confusion or misunderstandings later on. It takes a certain strength to be the woman behind the muscle man, and here’s why.


This is a vital component to dating a lifter, and it won’t take you long to realize what that means. They have to eat a lot. No, really. A LOT. And they eat almost constantly. Building and maintaining muscle mass means they need to ingest large amounts of protein. Imagine what you might eat for dinner on an average night: 8 ounces of steak, a couple cups of rice, and a cup of broccoli. Now, imagine eating that amount of food every two hours, all day long, and you’ll start to understand how much they actually eat in a 24 hour period.

It also means they will be on a very strictly regimented diet. They will not break it often, especially if they are in contest prep. You think you’ve got calorie counting skills? Wait until you see him in action. You can look forward to going to restaurants, BBQ’s, clam bakes, and fish fries where he’s going to reach into his bag, and pull out his own pre-prepped, perfectly weighed, and calculated meal rather than eat whatever is on the menu. And you need to be okay with that.

BONUS: The man can COOK! Prep cooking is something you can expect. Ever seen a kitchen with every available surface covered with freshly baked chicken breasts? Or a freezer stuffed to capacity with Tupperware containers that only represent a few days worth of meals? Don’t worry. You will.

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This is a huge issue when learning to love a bodybuilder. You need to understand that the gym is his passion, and he will be spending tons of time there. “How could that be a challenge?” you ask. Well, we women love attention. And there are going to be plenty of times when all you want in the world is to have your man come home to you, and spend the evening cuddled up on the couch, or go to a movie, or out to dinner, but he’s going to say that he has to go to the gym.

If he’s already a contest-winning professional, he might have sponsors that pay him to work out, so you’ll see him more. But if he’s like most of them, he works 40 hours a week and chases his dream on his own time.

That time will amount to two to three hours in the gym. Every. Single. Day. You have to find a way to deal with this. It can be challenging, as it might seem like he always puts you last. But do not mistake his dedication to his passion as a sign that he doesn’t care about you.

He probably cares about you more than anyone else in his life, but you have to understand that being a bodybuilder is his fire, his blood and that trying to get in between him and his gym time is how ex-girlfriends are made. Supporting his dream, however, will make him see you as the one in a million girl who just GETS him. Don’t try to make him choose between you and the thing he loves, and he will make you feel like a princess when you do get time together. Don’t forget, those huge arms are great for hugging.

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This one might sound strange at first, but you’re definitely going to notice that your guy looks in the mirror more than you do. You will likely catch him flexing to his reflection quite frequently. Don’t judge. He spends countless hours sweating and grunting in the gym to attain a body that wins trophies. Especially considering what he probably looked like when he started. He deserves to be proud of his gains.

Not to mention, “posing” is a huge factor in winning on stage. Posing correctly will show his muscles in their best possible light, and bad posing can be the difference between a champion and last place. Besides, what sane girlfriend could possibly dislike watching their shredded boyfriend flexing those fabulous muscles all the time?


Yes, they exist. You need to be a fairly secure woman to walk down the street with a bodybuilder, and not grit your teeth every time another woman stares at him. Because that happens. A lot. In fact, he will likely be getting attention from every direction because of how he looks. We would all like to believe that we are well-adjusted women who never get jealous.

That resolve will be tested just a bit when the fitness models from his gym are chatting him up in between sets. Just remember this: he’s with you. Bodybuilders posses a level of single-minded focus that you rarely see in other men, and that focus also applies to his woman. If you are the one he wants, you are the one he stays with.


If he is serious about getting big and competing, then be prepared for a tornado of supplements. Making huge muscles takes more than just picking up weights. He’s asking his body to do much more than it normally would. He restricts his diet to allow for measured amounts of calories, fat, carbs, and protein, so supplementing his nutrition is necessary.

On top of the everyday vitamins to make up for his lack of fresh fruits and veggies, there are many supplements he might be taking that have different benefits. When you see him popping two handfuls of pills every morning, rest assured that he is not, in fact, a drug addict. He’s just working on his gains.

protein shake

Feeling Safe

One of the best benefits of dating a bodybuilder is that no matter what size you are, he will always make you feel small and safe. There is just something so primal and satisfying about being the girl on the arm of a mountain. You’ll notice people are far less likely to become confrontational with him around.

As a curvy woman myself, I’ve never been the girl men throw over their shoulder and carry around. I was always afraid they would incur a serious back injury trying to lift me. I no longer have this issue. If he can deadlift 400lbs, he can toss my butt into the pool without blinking!


Bodybuilders have a bad rep for their moods. This is largely due to mainstream media portraying every bodybuilder as a ‘roided out anger ball. To be frank, yes, they tend to have mood swings, but this is mostly due to their diets. If they are bulking, meaning they can eat more fat and carbs because they are trying to put on weight, you’ll have a happy man on your hands.

During cutting and contest prep, when they severely limit their carb intake…prepare yourself for Captain Bitchy. Just try to understand that it isn’t you, and it doesn’t last. You’ll need to exert some patience and understanding during these times. They’ll thank you for it later if they haven’t eaten you.


With a bodybuilder, you’ll almost never have to wonder where they are. If they aren’t with you, they are either at the gym, eating, or sleeping. They generally do not drink because alcohol can have interactions with certain supplements, not to mention it can negatively impact their “gains”. So not only will you never have to worry about your man being a drunken barfly, but you will also have a permanent designated driver on your hands.

Of course, sometimes this can be a drag. You want to go out for a drink and a few laughs, and they sit beside you drinking water while you drink alone. That is IF you can get them out to a drinking establishment in the first place. Bodybuilders generally avoid bars and partying completely. It’s just not their jam.


Dating a bodybuilder can be just the inspiration you need to get into the gym yourself. Science has proven that weight-bearing exercise keeps you young. As you age, you lose about 1 pound of muscle per year if you aren’t actively using it. By the time you reach your golden years, this can add up to a great deal of atrophy, which results in loss of mobility and independence. Regular weight lifting can mean you’ll be spry and active for a very long time. Since he’s in the gym all the time anyway, working out together can be another opportunity for quality time together.

In fact, some bodybuilders actively seek women into fitness themselves, women who will lift with them. This can sometimes be a drag if you have your eye on a bodybuilder, but you aren’t that into the gym life. They can also be a little judgy about people who are overweight. They see being fit as something that anyone can attain if they work hard, and therefore, anyone NOT working hard is lazy. But this hardly describes all of them.

BONUS: You’ll never need to pay a personal trainer again!

Sex Drive

This one can be a positive, or a negative, depending on your perspective. Bodybuilders are rife with testosterone. They produce lots of it on their own just lifting weights, and some supplements can encourage testosterone too. This means his sex drive will be – ahem… in high gear. Depending on your own level of desire, this can either make you very happy or drive you up the wall. If you can’t see yourself in the sheets nearly every day, a bodybuilder might not be the best choice of mate. If your sex drive matches his, however, your needs will most certainly be met!




Writer and expert